Bean used to live outdoors until my my sister’s friend found her under a deck. We took her in three years ago. She had seven kittens and we kept five. She is mean to her offspring but has been getting nicer to us slowly. When we walk the dog at night, she sometimes follows us around meowing at a distance; when she catches up and we go to pet her, she runs ahead, waits, and the cycle repeats. Why is she so concerned and not letting us touch her?
I see people commenting that “cats are assholes, that’s why she does this! LOL” which is absolutely sad to see. Lots of people are more understanding of dogs who may have past trauma, but think that cats are immune to that?
I do not know the past history of this cat. You mentioned that they lived outside prior to you adopting them. Did they get pregnant when they were very young? Their “follow and yell”-technique may signify that they see you as A). a kitten straying too far from home or B). their parent/caretaker who they are scared of leaving. Possibly even both!
In short, they are showing concern for you. This is not “asshole” behavior. If she was not affectionate with her kittens, she may see you the same way. Cats don’t need to be cuddly in order to show love. This cat seems to be showing love in the only way it may know how.
Talk to the cat while you walk. Communicate back as it meows to you. She may just want reassurance that her one source of stability is not just going to disappear like lots of things in her scary life has.
Thank you for trying to understand your cat.
